"Fifty: The Ultimate F Word. Why are they targeting me? How do they know I’m 50? Ads, articles, and blogs popping up all over the place telling me what NOT to wear at "my age". They certainly don’t hold back from letting me know in no uncertain terms what will look absolutely terrible on me: graphic T’s, cleavage, trendy denim, “too-young” hair, not to mention ALL of my favorite make up tricks.
The seemingly never-ending lists of No-No’s got me thinking that in actuality, I don’t really want to spend one more second of energy worrying about how other people think I should look, dress or behave. Instead of allowing myself to be reigned by all the new rules, I’ve decided to make my own list; a list of some things I’ve noticed in my 25+ years working around women. Be certain of this: I love women of all ages. We are all wonderful in our own ways. But just for today, I made a list based on my many conversations with clients, friends, co-workers and relatives, tallying just a few of the things that are completely and utterly awesome about “women my age”.
- We don’t get pregnant. Winning already.
- We have the freedom to be spontaneous, since we probably don’t have little ones at home.
- Self-knowledge in the boardroom, and in the bedroom. We know what we want.
- Experience (yes, that kind). Let’s face it; we’ve had lots of practice. We not only know what we want, we’ve learned what men (or women) want.
- No hidden agendas. We take care of ourselves. You might say we are cats that are a little bit more like dogs in that way. We tend to pursue our passions without unrealistic expectations of life long commitment. We aren’t trying to rope anyone into much of anything.
- We aren’t needy. This stress-relief alone makes for a much more awesome experience. If we are taking time away from our family, career, and creative passions in order to be with you, it’s not because we need you: we want you!
- We understand the benefits of being physical. We don’t need to use sex as a weapon, or a bargaining chip. It’s pretty straightforward for us.
- Confidence. We have the kind of prowess that can only come with self-knowledge, self acceptance, and a lack of self consciousness, which all come with age.
- Conversation. We have the brains, guts, and self-confidence to actually have a real conversation! Saying it how you feel it…it’s a freaking amazing feeling!
- We aren’t afraid of communicating. You know where you stand with us. We don’t have time for mind games, and we aren’t worried about losing a man/woman if we express or share what we want.
- We can hold our own. No matter in what situation we find ourselves, it is more than likely not our fist time at the rodeo.
- We don’t move in herds. We don’t need to check in with our girlfriends every 15 minutes for approval or advice. We don’t’ need approval from any large groups or governing bodies. We don’t need your, or any one else’s, permission to live our lives.
- Brains above Beauty. Of course, we care a great deal about our presentation and our appeal. We work damn hard to keep ourselves fit and fine so that we can actually enjoy the lifestyle we’ve grown into. That being said, most of us over 50 are not striving for physical perfection. We know that to feed the head well is to feed the heart well. We find far more worth and value in how we think than how we look.
- We aren’t shallow. Not only do we care more about our minds and matter: we care more about your minds and matter. While most of us, at any age can appreciate beauty, we’ve lived long enough and had enough experience to actually, in a very true and sincere sense, appreciate more what a person has to offer mentally and emotionally than physically.
- Wisdom. We’ve lived a lot. We’ve seen a lot. We’ve done a lot. While most of us are completely uninterested in telling you what to do, in most cases, we can give you a pretty damn near perfect idea of what will work.
- We don’t carry around a lot of shame and regret. Let’s face it, it’s not a good look on anyone. We know that stuff ages us, and we’ve found the wiles and ways to let go of the choices, or the parts of our past that no longer suit us. Although we’ve given up hope on a better past and some of its scenarios, we are all for moving forward and creating a brilliant future for ourselves ands those we love.
- We fly our freak flags! While we may occasionally embarrass you, our lack of embarrassment about ourselves is entirely liberating. We are long past being ashamed or embarrassed about who we are. We like what we like. We do what we like. We are not embarrassed about what we like. We wear what we want. We dance and sing in public. We laugh LOUD.
- We’ve put away our rose-colored glasses. I dig reality; it’s raw. It’s real. It’s sexy. The women my age who I look up to are the same. We see ourselves for who we really are, and we see you the same. We take the good with the bad.
- We don’t carry the weight of the world. We’ve had some time to figure out what is important to us and to those we love. We pick our fights, and we fight the good, fair fight. Mostly we win.
- We are sensitive. That is not to say that we are overly emotional; we are sensitive to the needs and feelings of those around us. We care deeply, and no longer feel the need to remain stoic in every situation. While we don’t hide our feelings, it’s not likely you will see us shatter into a million pieces if things aren’t perfect.
- We are mentors. We are mothers, daughters, grandmothers, sisters, aunts, friends and lovers. We are teachers. We are less competitive and more sharing of our wealth of talents and wisdoms. We want those around us to succeed.
- We have time. Hopefully by now, most of us are experiencing a little extra time in our day. Without small children of our own to shuttle about, we can take the time to appreciate our older children, and their children.
- We are emotionally independent. We appreciate our own space. We don’t require constant companionship, comfort, entertainment or approval from a partner.
- We are financially independent. We like being treated, and being treated like a lady, but we don’t have financial expectations of you, and we are likely to return the treat just as often.
- Last but not least, love: We understand the value of both unconditional and conditional love. We understand the worth of Love over fear. Love over hate. We know the value of self-love. Love for those we know. Love for those we don’t. Love of the world. Love of beauty in all its forms.
Oh! Super important sidenote: We really have seen ALL the good bands. Really!
So, in short...scrap the “What-Not-To-Wear” list and wear what you want! Be comfortable, and be comfortable in your own skin and fly your freak flag!"
*Tammy Taylor is the proud and dedicated owner of Got Beauty and GotBeauty.com. This year, she is celebrating 25 years of being in the beauty business, and she would love to share it with you. Sign up for our Lovelist Rewards program so you can stay tuned for exclusive specials going on all this year.
Posted by Sadie Upwall
Project Manager and Editor for the best little beauty business in town.